Vova and Female Teacher: IN ENGLISH CLASS

An inspector to check on the sense of English learning, Vova sitting beside him. As a new teacher, she was very nervous.
Teacher:
- Now I will write one sentence in English on the board, then you try to translate it
Russian.
The teacher is writing the sentence unfinished chalk crashed, she bent down to pick up and continue writing for all questions.
- And now someone will translate this sentence?
Vova hands immediately. The teacher was incredibly nervous, looking around the classroom but outside Vova is no one raised their hands. Vova designated teacher had said.
Vova:
- I wish that dress shorter ........
- What! You turn right out of the classroom!
Vova finished collecting books papaya fist into his face inspection:
- You idiot, did not know they had a show not to mention all!

Differences between WIFE and GIRLFRIEND

Vova wrote to his daddy: What are the differences between WIFE and GIRLFRIEND, Dad? 
His Daddy replies: My dear, Wife is a TV. Girl friend is a HandPhone. At home watch TV. Go out, bring HandPhone. No money, sell TV. Got money, change HandPhone. Sometimes enjoy TV, but most of the time play with HandPhone. TV is free for life. But HandPhone, if you don't pay, services will be TERMINATED!!! But u should be careful with both, my dear son...^^