When male teachers do their own birth

The teacher asked the class in math puzzle.
- If last year my twin 2 sons, 1 daughter extra this year, I have how many children?
The class was very quiet, well-known fly hear. Seeing no one raised their hands, he said:
- TI, said he heard what?
TI confused:
- Teacher does not have any children.
He was surprised:
- Hey Look, last year 2, year 1 ...
Assertive little shook his head:
- Dear no sir ... My mother says men of childbearing are not forever.

Super fantasy Staff

A few weeks after being admitted to work, he was called up to the HR department.
- What's this? - The manager asked - Why when submitting your resume, you have 5 years of experience, we found out he had never done this ever work?

He replied:

- Oh good, sir, not in the message he needs to recruit people with a rich imagination is what? :D

Vova and Female Teacher: IN ENGLISH CLASS

An inspector to check on the sense of English learning, Vova sitting beside him. As a new teacher, she was very nervous.
Teacher:
- Now I will write one sentence in English on the board, then you try to translate it
Russian.
The teacher is writing the sentence unfinished chalk crashed, she bent down to pick up and continue writing for all questions.
- And now someone will translate this sentence?
Vova hands immediately. The teacher was incredibly nervous, looking around the classroom but outside Vova is no one raised their hands. Vova designated teacher had said.
Vova:
- I wish that dress shorter ........
- What! You turn right out of the classroom!
Vova finished collecting books papaya fist into his face inspection:
- You idiot, did not know they had a show not to mention all!

Differences between WIFE and GIRLFRIEND

Vova wrote to his daddy: What are the differences between WIFE and GIRLFRIEND, Dad? 
His Daddy replies: My dear, Wife is a TV. Girl friend is a HandPhone. At home watch TV. Go out, bring HandPhone. No money, sell TV. Got money, change HandPhone. Sometimes enjoy TV, but most of the time play with HandPhone. TV is free for life. But HandPhone, if you don't pay, services will be TERMINATED!!! But u should be careful with both, my dear son...^^

Identification of ghost

Two ghosts see a car sitting in the mixed doubles few meters from that position.
- I took his car to the other couple take a stroll.

- Or cool. Get in the car.

- Wait for me at all.

Ghost of his grave site and then brought to the huge tombstone. The other ghost asked:

- What are you doing? VAC do?

- That his identification. The police will ask you ...
mountains